Fri 30-Apr-10 (Weekend ahead)

Ben had his best mate Matt over for a play date. His brother Josh joined us a little later and the five of us went through three pizzas for dinner. I let Ben and Gabi stay up later tonight, so they were pretty exhausted by the time they got into bed.

Ben is very excited about his first AFL match in the morning. Fortunately his matches are at 10:45am each week so it shouldn't be too cold by that time of morning.
The kids and I will be attending a Reflective Service at the Hospice in the afternoon. We decided not to invite any family or friends. Apart from us, there will be our neighbour (and friend) Elaine, who lost her husband Alan at the Hospice two-and-a-half weeks before Maria. A few neighbours will also be present. In the evening a larger group of neighbours will congregate at Elaine's home for a dinner and time together. I've just worked on creating a DVD that incorporates slideshows from both Alan's and Maria's funeral services to play.

We'll try and get to church on Sunday and probably relax as much as possible. 

Happy birthday Kathy...

...our dear sister from Israel who is now back in Texas enjoying her special day with her precious family.

We love you.

Thu 29-Jun-10 (Gabi in the paper, Ben's last pre-season training session)

Yesterday a friend bumped into Gabi and said he had seen her photo in the Chronicle newspaper. Gabi said it must have been mistaken identity. She mentioned it to me in passing but I didn't really take much notice.

Last night I received an SMS from a friend saying Gabi was in the paper when at drama on one of her play dates last week. I told Gabi this morning, who was very excited. Unfortunately, for some reason the paper did not arrive on our driveway as yet. I'm hopeful that we don't miss it.

Ben had his last pre-season training session this evening. It's getting that little bit colder each night. He is sleeping well on Tuesdays and Thursdays because of the activity. Here are a couple of photos of him in his gear. He disappointingly wasn't allowed to sleep in it as it needs to be ready for Saturday morning's match.

A DVD worth watching

Some weeks ago I was given a DVD called "HOPE - When Life Hurts Most" by Louie Giglio (thanks Ado). After promising to spend more time with God in such busy times, I finally got to sit down tonight after finishing work at home at watch the first part (The Anchor of Hope). As it's nearly midnight, I'll need to wait until tomorrow night to watch the second/final part (The Megaphone of Hope).

I really enjoy watching an effective communicator who teaches in a real and passionate way. In fact, sitting here brought back memories of the latter part of Maria's illness as we sat and watched Louie's "Indescribable" DVD, which was awesome. Maria too was really encouraged and moved by his teaching.

Website revamp

I have started to experiment with our family website and plan to revamp it as I teach myself on the run. It will hopefully have a new look and feel over time. Much of this will be subject to my ability to 'play', when I have the time.

To get things started, I created a very simple "flash" type intro, which includes photos to music (the intro can be skipped).

I intend to do some more with the intro down the track to make it look professional (well as best as can be when you are talking "self-taught").

In case you haven't had the opportunity to visit, the website (dedicated to Maria) is www.kaizik.com

Sun 25-Apr-10 (Anzac Day, previous week)

We have just finished the kids' last week of school holidays. It was a busy week for a range of reasons, especially as I didn't have holidays. Because I'm feeling quite flat at present (combination of general exhaustion and probably part of the grieving process) I'm going to keep it brief.

Mon, Wed, Fri

Spent with Kathryn and her girls. They were busy with activities at home, the park, gold panning and Questacon. Both our families had a family night dinner and DVD night on Friday, which was lovely. A nice way to cap off the week. Taking the kids for 3 of the 5 days was a blessing beyond words for me.

Tue (20th)

It was three months since Maria went to be with the Lord.
The kids saw a movie and played at a dear friend's place (thanks Doreen). 

Thu

Both kids had separate play dates at their best friends' homes (thanks Karen & Leanne), with Ben having footy training at the end of the day (thanks Paul for chauffeuring him).

Sat

A whole day of hanging around the house. I spent a bit of that time out doing a major shop. Watched a movie together. Otherwise very quiet and lazy.

My brother and his family moved into their new home. Because of my sheer fatigue and laziness I haven't spoken to them as yet to see how the move went. Will follow that up on Monday morning.

Sun

Got up a little late and sluggish. After a pancake breakfast made our way to the shopping centre as we had missed church. Forgot that because it is Anzac Day, the centre didn't open until 1:00pm. Made the trek back and spent 3 1/2 hours there getting last minute things for the kids and buying myself some new business shirts and ties. Unfortunately none of the hairdressers were open so Ben still looks like a mop head and Gabi's not far behind. We'll try tomorrow. Spent the afternoon/evening getting on top of some loads of washing, followed by the bedtime reading ritual (with both separately) before having some prayer time with Justin. 

Tomorrow is a public holiday here in Australia. What will we do? All a bit jaded. Probably just hang around the house, call my brother, as well as get out for a short stint to the hairdressers and have my suits dry-cleaned. Boring life, no?

Sun 18-Apr-10 (events of the week)

After a busy Monday, Tuesday was generally a good day. The antibiotics started to take effect.

On Wednesday, Maria's parents collected the kids and took them to Brian and Effie's in Cooma. I took Dad and Mum out for dinner, then went off to a movie with a dear mate (Justin) as it was the last night "The Green Zone" was showing.

Thursday was another nice and busy day at work. Dad and Mum headed home during the day. After work I went to Justin and Kathryn's for dinner and a lot of time just fellowshipping. It was so relaxing and nice. I did however miss not having the kids around.

On Friday I left work earlier in the afternoon, packed and headed to Cooma. Had a nice evening and headed off on Saturday morning for Maria's parents' (Mama and Baba) home. We spent the afternoon around the house. I had a lot of time to play with the kids (felt some aches and pains this morning). In the afternoon we headed down to one of the boardwalks with Mama and came across a seal and a couple of stingrays. We drove around to another spot, where we came across a seal lazing on the rocks.

Today we went to the beach (I forgot our swimmers) with Baba, so we went into the water in our shorts (and Gabi with a t-shirt of course). The water was so warm and the weather delightful.

We ventured down to the boardwalk again to find two seals and five stingrays. There were some guys cleaning their fish, so they put the leftovers next to us for the rays to come up and take, which gave us the opportunity to hold and pat them. they are slimy, yet velvety. The kids were so excited.

After lunch I chatted for a while with Mama and Baba. I took this photo of Mama with the kids on their balcony before we left. As you can see from the background, they are quite close to the water.

We hit the road a lot later than planned, but had a good trip back.

Mon 12-Apr-10 (very long day)

I got off to work early in an attempt to get a full work day in, so I didn't have to do extra hours at home because of the school holidays and how I'm feeling.

I contacted our GP in the morning and she arranged to see me before she started seeing patients in the afternoon. I ducked out from a busy morning to see the doctor and while waiting for my script (I have bronchitis that is also affecting my trachea and sinuses) I heard squealing and looked to see Ben and Gabi running toward me. They had been to a movie (How to Train Your Dragon 3D) with dad and mum and stopped on the way back to get some shopping. They were in the playground and happened to see me. As I left, they asked when I'd be home. I said, "before it gets dark." Famous last words.

I got back to the office in time for a critical meeting, which led to a few hours of work. I left at 7:00pm, feeling quite weary and stuffy. It was nice to spend some time with the kids reading to them individually before bed.

It's nearly 9:00pm and I am about to get to bed myself to try and rest in preparation for what might be another busy day.

Sun 11-Apr-10 (events of the last week)

I haven't posted for a week, mainly due to work and illness. There is not too much to write about from the early part of the week.

My parents arrived on Thursday to stay for a week and see the kids perform at "Grandparents' Day", held at their school on Friday (their last day of term). As I wasn't able to stay around for the performance, Gabi's teacher kindly had the kids do a mini performance at the end of the school day for me to see.

I woke on Saturday morning with stomach cramping on top of the flu and chest issues. After breakfast I slept through until lunch. I went and kicked the ball with Ben (as promised the day before), then slept until dinner.

On Sunday we went to church, visited the cemetery, had lunch nearby and headed home. I slept again from mid-afternoon until dinner.

Apart from feeling unwell, I think my body is taking the opportunity to catch up on months of lost sleep. I feel sad for the kids, but my body won't allow me to be very active.

I'll be working through the school holidays. Mum and Dad will take care of Ben and Gabi throughout the week as well as a visit to Cooma. I'll be trying to arrange play dates for the kids throughout the second week.

Sun 4-Apr-10 (Easter Sunday)

There are quite a few photos in this entry, but due to me not having had our camera attended to, I'm using my phone at present.

The kids woke me very excitedly to tell me that they had a present for me. They took me into the front part of the house to show me they had cleaned it all up –– even my work desk. What a blessing!

The kids then opened gifts from each other, me, grandparents, and friends from the States (thanks O'Meara clan).

Gabi also made me a lovely card.

I knew a dear friend was working all night and her kids were away, so we had her join us for breakfast. She generously brought along breakfast as well as her family's bunny.

We headed off to church and afterwards came home for an Easter Egg hunt. I went off for a nap to try and get through the day. The three of us headed to the Cemetery (the granite stone and plaque should be finished in the next few weeks) to hang out briefly and leave some flowers from our garden...

...before heading over to dear friends where we spent the next 5+ hours. The three of us really love their company. We even had a traditional Greek egg-cracking competition with the eggs Gabi and I prepared (see photo below) the previous evening.

The kids went to bed quite late, with their exhaustion quite evident. This in part is due to last night's changeover from daylight saving (i.e. their body-clocks would think it is an hour later). Let's hope that means extra sleep at the other end.

HAPPY EASTER FROM THE THREE OF US!

HAPPY EASTER, Resurrection Eggs & Maria

I was about to post this entry when I realised it is just after midnight, so I've re-typed this first paragraph to wish everyone a HAPPY EASTER!

"Resurrection Eggs" –– While we were in Israel some dear friends had a (plastic) carton, which simply contain 12 plastic eggs (one for each of the 12 days leading up to Easter). When opened, each egg contains a small figurine/toy/symbol (except the final one, which is empty to represent the empty tomb) to represent the lead-up to Jesus' arrest, crucifixion and resurrection. It comes with a small book that has a bible verse and speaks a little more into the subject. It's not only a great illustration for us, but is very effective in children's ministry and outreach.

The reason I share this is not to give the marketers a plug, but rather because of the memory it holds for us. Maria purchased this during her illness as she was keen to make it part of our family tradition. Unfortunately she purchased them after last Easter, so she never got to enjoy the experience with us.

What I emphasised in each of my Easter cards to Ben and Gabi is that while this a time of sadness for us as a family, there is happiness and hope. Why? Because Jesus' death on the cross for our (i.e. everyone's) sins and His subsequent resurrection has given us all the chance to have eternal life with Him in heaven. Maria went ahead of us to experience what a place of no pain and suffering is like. 

I am so ENCOURAGED and EXCITED that up until now (before and after Maria's illness) the kids have not strayed from their respective personal decision to believe in Jesus as their Lord and Saviour. Why the JOY for me? Well, not only is it the most important decision they will ever make while alive on Earth (actually for anyone, this includes you), but the kids have done so without any intentional influence under such difficult circumstances. What I mean is I have been very careful not to use my faith as some type of emotional blackmail for the kids to follow, only in the hope that this will allow them to be reunited with Maria one day. They just know the truth. For those of you who know them very well would also attest that Ben and Gabi are no dummies or pushovers.

Is it easy to follow Jesus? Not on your life. When the world moves in one direction, driven by having "things" (fame, popularity, wealth, the perfect face/body, bling) as their gods/idols, to step out and be someone who "is in the world" but "not of the world" is like walking against the flow of that tide. As you know, it is far simpler to go with the current than against it. That's why being a true follower of Jesus is not easy.

I know there may be some of you out there reading this and thinking about stories (either personal or you're read/heard) of people claiming to be Christians who are hypocrites as they behave in a way that does NOT upholds what God teaches. You may think that of me for some reason. Up until I made my commitment in 2001, I felt hurt or betrayed by the church because of the innumerable incidents that "Christians" were responsible for, without understanding among other things that we live in a fallen/sinful world and it is the people (not God) who have chosen to sin. This is starting to lead into a sermon or personal testimony, which I'll leave for a time when I have the physical strength to do so.

I just want to finish off by thanking God because He loves each of us so much that He chose to send His one and only Son into the world to be THE atoning sacrifice for all of our sins. All we have to do is accept the FREE GIFT of believing in Jesus' resurrection (from the dead) to experience eternal life. HAPPY EASTER!

Sat 3-Apr-10 (quieter day, increased unwell-ness)

I tried to sleep in a little as I had some issues through the night with an increase in chest symptoms––feeling as though an infection is coming on. The kids still have their coughs, which come and go.

We ducked down to the local shops so the kids could discretely buy each other an Easter Egg. It gave me a chance to do the same for them, as well as buy some smaller ones for a "hunt". At home they worked on cards for each other.

I had to decline a dinner invitation for this evening. It was well that I did as I seemed to decline and needed to sleep in the afternoon, which took the edge of how I've been feeling. Unfortunately that improvement has now worn off.

We watched a movie together over dinner. Although they didn't get to bed until nearly 9pm, we gain an hour overnight coming off daylight-saving. For many out there without kids, that means an hour's extra sleep. If Ben has his 6:00am wake-up, it will actually be 5:00am. He's very good at occupying himself, but let's hope he's not too noisy as his Star Wars play can sometimes lead to the mimicking of laser weapons being fired.

I'm off to bed shortly myself to see if more rest will help because we will have an Easter Egg hunt before church, church itself, and another dinner invitation tomorrow night.

Fri 2-Apr-10 (church in the park, visit)

The day started with church in the park. After the glorious weather we've had in recent weeks, the weather change finally came through and it was a lot colder and more overcast than what we've been accustomed to. It was enjoyable.

I spent the afternoon at home with the kids playing Clone Wars (play acting, that is) and had a visit in the afternoon from a dear friend who also brought a meal (thanks Cath). It was nice to hang out over a coffee.

I have been struggling with this chest complaint and asthma and my coughing started to increase, so I got into bed a little earlier than normal to try and sleep it off.

Thu 1-Apr-10 (first week @ work, sport, meals, tomorrow's church service)

April Fools Day was a quiet one with the three of us forgetting about it, and no-one at work having the time or energy to come up with a prank.

With tomorrow being the Good Friday public holiday and Monday also being a public holiday for Easter Monday in Australia, this means that my first two weeks at work will be short ones. That said, the first week has been quite exhausting for me, not only managing the days, but also making up additional work hours at night. I'm starting to sleep again, so that's a good outcome. I am however feeling quite run down with the chesty cough and what feels like some asthma. Nothing of any real significance, just annoying.

The kids ran their Cross Country events at school today. Both did quite well––better than they expected. I was proud that they competed, especially for Gabi who was very reluctant in the lead-up to the day.

I got to school late due to work and traffic issues. It was therefore a rush to get Ben to his first AFL (footy) training session. He seemed to enjoy it.

It was lovely to come home to find that our table had been set and a meal as well as some Easter treats had been left for us (thanks Viv).

On the topic of meals, I failed to mention the other day that we were blessed with an impromptu meal on Tuesday evening, which really helped out (thanks Jennie). Sometimes my mind is sharp and sometimes it's custard!

It's going to be interesting to see how the weekend goes––our first Easter without Maria by our side.

Tomorrow morning our church is doing a service in the large park at Gordon (across the road from the school where we worship), followed by morning tea, activities and hot cross buns. We're looking forward to it. The kids only got into bed a few minutes ago, so hopefully they'll sleep in (but they won't).